Remember The Time Chris Rock Taught Us How to be Married?

“If you got someone you love, hold tight.” Chris Rock

Colleen Murphy

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Photo by Maarten van den Heuvel on Unsplash

Divorce. Not the outcome any of us want. But it is the outcome half of us get. Chris Rock may sound like just another celebrity throwing away their relationship in search of greener pastures. If you listen to him closely, you can hear that isn’t true. He has genuine regret.

The eventuality of divorce is as common as couples who stay together. Not all factors are in your control. But if you want a first-hand account of how it all can go wrong, listen to Chris. He had it all…what any of us would term as success. Plenty of money, the ability to do what he loves for a living. A beautiful wife and two daughters. Yet someone who had the ability to build a tremendous amount of success in his professional life found himself facing a real personal crisis.

Chris stood up and told his story in his Netflix special Tambourine. He told us wasn’t a great husband. He said didn’t listen. He told us he had multiple affairs. He said he was addicted to porn. He said felt entitled. He told us how he paid for everything and felt that was the extent of what he owed to the relationship.

He was wrong.

But the difference between Chris and a lot of other people is that he did his homework. He thought about it. He examined his role and then he shared what he learned.

Honestly. Brutally. Publicly.

Great relationships are a collaboration

“People say relationships are tough. No they are not. They are only tough when one person is working on it. Two people can move a couch real easy. One person can’t move it at all.” -Chris Rock

No one can do it alone. You can’t be good enough or work hard enough to make up for a partner who isn’t even trying.

In a good relationship, we care about the other person’s perspective. We try to support, to understand. It is all about the way we view our partner. Do we see that person as someone who provides real value in our lives? And are we providing the same kind of value to their life?

You have to be in or get out

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Colleen Murphy

Writing about the beautiful journey of life and love. We are all figuring this out together